The first instance came with a visit from Father Charlie Strobel. It was so sad for me to hear the story of his friends. Those people, who at 60, were just starting to follow their heart. I understand the idea that people get caught up in the world of families and jobs and are often too occupied with their obligations to their lives to get the chance to follow their dreams. I kept thinking to myself that there has to be a way to serve others while still living a life with a family and job.
The second time this popped up was in my reading of The Long Loneliness. In this section she talks about the death of one of their friends, Steve. Steve in talking to Dorothy says, "There is so much that I wanted to do." She said he felt, "bitterness at not being used, as writer, speaker, teacher." He felt unused. What a horrid feeling! This is probably one of my greatest fears. To wake up one day and realize that my life is over and I haven't been needed, that I won't be missed, that I have not used all my gifts and talents.
After reading these things I kept wondering how I could have the balance between family, work, and following your heart in my life. Then it hit me. I need to find a job that I am passionate about. I began to wonder if my current major is where I need to be (by the way not a good thought to have at 1 am when trying to fall asleep). My passion and my heart lie in serving people. Maybe by following this I can be lying on my death bed without regret, ready to face whatever awaits me.
I definitely agree with you. This is such a daunting though. And I HATE to think about death. I have a strong feeling about destiny though. We have aligned ourselves on a certain chain of events that will lead us to our ultimate fate. I try to justify this by saying that God has many paths for us that will lead to the same destination. And is it not odd that destination sounds a lot like destiny. Our destiny is our end point, our finish line. And I strongly feel that through grace, we are lead to our intended finish line. But it is ultimately your decision if you follow God and follow your heart to do something you love and God will love for you to do. I pray that you are able to find your path to your destiny. Love the post.
ReplyDeleteThis is something that we all struggle with, though. I think that it would be almost unnatural not to think about "Am I going to be happy the die that I die". The way that I think about this is: You are going to regret the things you DID NOT do more than the things that you DID DO. When I look back at life, I want to be totally at place; I don't want there to be anything that I wished I had done. You need to love your family, your friends, everyone, but most importantly you need to love yourself, and give yourself the things you need. If (and I say "if" because this is often the most difficult thing we will ever do) you can do this, then I think you'll be totally complacent with death.
ReplyDeleteAnd remember, its never too late to start over! So long as it is what you want to do, than any time is the right time, no matter what time it is.
ReplyDeleteDeath is probably on the top of everyone's fear list. I know it is mine. I realize everyone has to die, but it is still scary. I am very excited to join God in heaven soon, but I am afraid of the way I could die. With this being said, I firmly believe that God has put everyone on this earth for a purpose. My belief is God will not take you out of this world until your purpose in life has been fulfilled. So don't have any regrets because they are all a part of the lesson of life. Remember everything happens for a reason.
ReplyDeleteI think the future is so daunting!!! The only thought I have found to console me is that I am only promised today! This moment...I don't know what tomorrow has in store or even if it will come! I love this guy, Eric Hutchinson, he is a singer and he has this amazing song called Food Chain; it goes along with Sydney's second comment. The song is about how being alive is making choices, and we are only human, so what do we do when we make stupid choices or, for me, choices that reject God's call on my life. The chorus ends, "if you get lost start over again, but we don't ever get to stop". There are no do-overs, but we have the power to end chapters in our life and begin new ones!
ReplyDeleteP.S.- What our professors and parents and pastors and whoever else don't tell us is that we don't have to do the same thing for the REST OF OUR LIVES!!!! I hope that takes the pressure off that at the tender age of 18-19, you have to figure out who you are and what you want to do until you die!
Amen Abby. I'm struggling with a choice in my major, and it weighs so heavily on my heart. I'm so afraid of falling into that routine- the get the most "successful" career, make a lot of money to support your family, wake up in the middle of the night 30 years later and wonder where your life has gone- routine. I want to make a difference in my life and in other people's lives. At this point, I feel as though everyone is pressuring me to make decisions about the future and I'M COMING UP BLANK.
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